And so it was that the World Cup came to a rather messy halt. It’s been an uppy-downy tournament, thanks to disappointing superstars, weird new balls, and a final that found the Dutch looking for a fight.

But it’s not all been bad. After the jump, you’ll find ten very important lessons learned over the last few weeks…

1. Don’t Get Too Scientific About The Ball

For all that is wonderful about scientists — rockets, orange squash, funny electronic voices — they have no place in football. Footballs should be solely designed by men who wear polo shirts with upturned collars, and smoke cigarettes using a thumb/forefinger pincer. We know that now.

2. Adrian Chiles Needs Better Company

After a sheepish start, Adrian Chiles grew into his role as the handsome face of ITV football. On the downside he was too often left in the wrong company, and expected to drag insightful comments from men who rarely know which tense to use. He would do well to pull the same trick he managed with Lampsie’s bed partner (pictured), and persuade his old pal Lee Dixon to jump ship.

3. Curb The England Fanfair

History will tell you that England is not the greatest team in the world. The rest of the world will also tell you that England is not the greatest team in the world. So, rather than getting carried away with the “it’s our year” guff, how about just shutting the hell up and letting 23 tatted-up millionaires enjoy themselves for a couple of weeks? That way, you won’t get beautiful girls dancing around in their swimming cozzies one day, then crying hysterically the next, just because Wayne Rooney can’t be bothered to be brilliant any more. Who needs to see that? Tell you who? No one. No one needs to see that.

4. DEFINITELY Give Too Many Tickets To Robbie Earle

Of course, everyone went mental when news of Robbie Earle flogging his free courtesy tickets rose to the surface like unsightly gunk on an otherwise lovely garden pond. But come off it! Robbie Earle awkwardly eating a bag of crisps surrounded by sixty empty seats? Or a mob of hot Dutch girls in identical outfits? Well played Robbie!

5. Frenchmen Need Their Own Space

Regardless that they spent the build up to the World Cup going for relaxing bike rides, dicking around with guns, and enduring hour long getting-to-know-you hugs, the volatile French just need a bit of alone time unless you really want them to aggressively call your mother a whore. Next World Cup, at least 23 different hotels would be advised for the trip.

6. Vuvuzelas Are Not The Way Forward

The reason why recorders have tiny little holes in them is because the sound of one note can eventually drive a man to the very edges of insanity. Next time around, if there is going to be an unusual instrument, might The Spoiler suggest a few thousand Moog keyboards?

7. The BBC Should Replace Shearer With Seedorf

Rather terrifyingly, Alan Shearer seems to be growing in confidence — this needs to stop. If it doesn’t stop, he won’t go away. He’ll be there, World Cup 2018, explaining that “a younger Rooney would have got to that”, in between repeating what everyone else knows but thinks is surely too obvious to say on television when you’re supposed to be “an expert”. Anyway, none of that is the point, the point is that Seedorf was great, Shearer was Shearer. The transfer window is open.

8. If An Octopus Has Something To Say, Listen To It

For far too long, people have been ignoring octopuses — with their weird slimy faces, and their delicious long arms. But that’s all changed with the emergence of Paul the Octopus. From now on, haggered old sea hunters might think twice before putting a few rounds from a machine gun into our psychic friends.

9. God Hates Real Madrid

Not only did Real Madrid’s two star men suffer an appalling tournament, but they saw the thing won by Vincente Del Bosque (pictured, having the last laugh) — a man cruelly sacked by the club in 2003. To smear extra salt into the weeping sore, two of the stars of the competition — Wesley Sneijder and Arjen Robben — were cast offs from the club, and every Spain goal came from a Barcelona player. Plus, of course, the Golden Ball player, Diego Forlan, plies his trade at Atletico.

Yes, the actual World Cup was lifted by a Real player, but you know, that’s just splitting hairs, isn’t it?

10. Expect The Unexpected, Right Up Until The Very Moment That What You Expected To Happen In The First Place Happens. So, In That Sense, Just Expect The Expected

Everyone thought that Spain would win it. Then they lost their first match, and everyone thought that Spain would PROBABLY win it. Then they started winning matches, and everyone KNEW that Spain would win it. Then, as expected, they won it. Of course, Alan Shearer was very quick to point out that he’d tipped them from the start… yes, as had absolutely everyone, Alan.

This post, written by Josh Burt, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff.

JOHANNESBURG (AP) — Spain rules the soccer world, winning the World Cup at long, long last.

It came after an exhausting 1-0 victory in extra time over the Netherlands on Sunday. Two years after winning the European title, the stylish Spaniards did even better.

This was a physical test of attrition that sometimes turned dirty – a finals-record 13 yellow cards were handed out and the Dutch finished with 10 men. In the end, it was Andres Iniesta breaking free in the penalty area, taking a pass from Cesc Fabregas and putting a right-footed shot from 8 yards just past the outstretched arms of goalkeeper Maarten Stekelenburg with about seven minutes still to play, including injury time.

“When I struck it, it just had to go in,” Iniesta said.

For the Dutch and their legions of orange-clad fans wearing everything from jerseys to jumpsuits to clown gear to pajamas, it was yet another disappointment.

Even with their first World Cup title tantalizingly within reach, they failed in the final for the third time. This one might have been the most bitter because, unlike 1974 and 1978, the Netherlands was unbeaten not only in this tournament, but in qualifying for the first World Cup staged in South Africa.

Soccer City was soaked in Oranje, from the seats painted in that hue throughout the stadium to pretty much everyone seated in them. Unlike when they lost to hosts West Germany and Argentina in previous finals, the Dutch were something of a home team this time.

The Spaniards, though, were the winners.

“We have all done an incredible job,” Iniesta said. “I don’t think we even realize what we have done.”

They had pockets of supporters, too, to be sure, dressed in red and scattered around the stadium. They might have been the minority, but when the final whistle blew, they were tooting their vuvuzelas loudest in tribute to their champions.

The goal in the 116th minute came off a turnover by the Dutch defense that Fabregas controlled just outside the penalty area. Iniesta stayed on the right and sneaked in to grab the pass and put his shot to the far post. Stekelenburg barely brushed it with his fingertips as it soared into the net.

Iniesta tore off his jersey after the goal and raced to the corner where he was mobbed by his teammates. Several Dutch players wiped away tears as they received their medals as runners-up — yet again. They won every qualifying match and all six previous games in South Africa before the bitter ending.

The Netherlands now has more victories in World Cup games without a title than any nation: 19. Spain held that dubious record with 24.

Netherlands coach Bert van Marwijk took off his silver medal as soon as left the podium, with a look of disgust on his face.

The Spaniards saluted their fans with arms raised high, then lifted their coach, Vicente del Bosque, in the air in celebration.

“This is immeasurable for Spain,” Del Bosque said.

Goalkeeper Iker Casillas, the captain, accepted the trophy from FIFA president Sepp Blatter, kissed it and raised it for all to see while cameras flashed and confetti flew throughout the still-full stadium.

Soon, the entire team and staff gathered at midfield for a group photo. The players bounced up and down to the World Cup theme song, then took a victory lap as the trophy was passed to each member of the squad.

“It’s the most beautiful that there is. It’s spectacular,” Iniesta said, referring to the gold ball.

Aside from a European title in 1988, the Dutch have been classic underachievers on the pitch. Results never matched the talent. These were no Dutch masters.

Yet the Spaniards haven’t been much better. Other than Euro championships in 1964 and 2008, they rarely have contended in major tournaments. At least the Netherlands made those two World Cup finals and also got to the semifinals in 1998.

Second-ranked Spain started this World Cup in the worst way, losing to Switzerland. But Spain won every game after that, including a 1-0 victory over powerful Germany that was far more one-sided than the score indicated. No other nation has won the World Cup after losing its opener.

Yet the most dangerous player Sunday was Netherlands forward Arjen Robben. He had a rare breakaway in the 62nd minute after a brilliant through pass from Wesley Sneijder. He had the ball on his preferred left foot, but a charging Casillas barely got his right leg on the shot to deflect it wide of the gaping net.

Then it was Stekelenburg’s turn, holding his ground after a misplay in front of the net gave the ever-potent Villa an open shot.

As play opened up, the crowd of 84,490 got quieter in nervous anticipation of the goal that would win the World Cup.

Robben again looked as though he might get it with a burst of speed past the defense, but Casillas sprinted from his net and smothered the ball before Robben could take a shot.

A second straight World Cup final headed into extra time, with the goalkeepers unbeatable. Stekelenburg, relatively inexperienced on the international level, made a spectacular left leg save when Fabregas broke free early in overtime.

Before the game, former South African president Nelson Mandela received a huge ovation when he was driven onto the field on a golf cart. A smiling Mandela waved to the fans as the vuvuzelas buzzed throughout Soccer City.

—

Lineups:

Netherlands: Maarten Stekelenburg, Gregory van der Wiel, John Heitinga, Joris Mathijsen, Giovanni van Bronckhorst (Edson Braafheid, 105), Mark van Bommel, Nigel de Jong (Rafael van der Vaart, 99), Dirk Kuyt (Eljero Elia, 71), Wesley Sneijder, Arjen Robben, Robin van Persie.

Spain: Iker Casillas, Sergio Ramos, Carles Puyol, Gerard Pique, Joan Capdevila, Sergio Busquets, Xabi Alonso (Cesc Fabregas, 87), Xavi Hernandez, Andres Iniesta, Pedro Rodriguez (Jesus Navas, 60), David Villa (Fernando Torres, 106).

By Ridge Mahoney for Soccer America

[SPAIN-NETHERLANDS] For the eighth time, the World Cup final is an all-Euro showdown, and the 2010 edition will not only crown a first-time champion, it will also produce either the first team to win the title after losing its first group game (Spain), or a nation winning a final after losing twice (Netherlands).

On the dubious side, the Dutch could also be the first team to lose a third final without winning at least one. They lost to the host nation both times in excruciating circumstances: in 1974 to West Germany, 2-1, after taking the lead in the first minute, and four years later in overtime to Argentina, 3-1, after scoring a late equalizer and then hitting the post in the 89th minute.

Spain is in its first final, and along with the Dutch is the most prestigious soccer nation never to win the World Cup. Early in the competition it labored under the pressures and expectations laden onto it and the other pre-tournament darling, Brazil, which the Netherlands dispatched, 2-1, in the quarterfinals after falling behind early.

In addition to surrendering that disheartening goal by Robinho in the 10th minute, the Netherlands has given away two penalty kicks, and conceded an equalizer to Cameroon in its final group game before snagging a late winner from substitute Klaas Jan-Huntelaar. The Dutch also played their first two group matches – victories over Denmark (2-0) and Japan (1-0) – without effervescent wingerArjen Robben. They’ve won all six of their World Cup games in regulation, yet it can’t be said the Dutch haven’t overcome some adversity.

As the clear favorite in Group E, the Dutch were expected to finish ahead of Denmark, Japan, and Cameroon, and duly did so as one of only two teams taking maximum points, the other being Argentina.

Without Robben, Coach Bert van Marwijk used Liverpool’s Dirk Kuyt on the right side of midfield and Rafael Van der Vaart on the left as the wide players in support of forward Robin Van Persie. Attacking mid Wesley Sneijder’s ability come deep to start attacks and also get forward to support them or finish them off hasn’t been contained by any opponent to date.

Robben made his first appearance in the third group game against Cameroon in the 70th minute, and set up the winner 13 minutes later when his shot rebounded off the post for Huntelaar to stick into the net.

Robben has scored twice in the knockout phase with a cutback move and left-footed shot against Slovakia, and a header to clinch the 3-2 semifinal defeat of Uruguay. His pace, change of direction, and eagerness to shoot have sparked a offensive surge by the Dutch, who have scored seven goals in the last three games with him in the starting lineup.

Five different players – including an own goal by Danish defender Daniel Agger – scored for the Netherlands in the group phase. Sneijder leads the team with five goals, and beyond him there’s balance; in addition to Robben’s pair, single goals have been registered by Van Persie, Kuyt, Huntelaar, and left back – and captain – Giovanni Van Bronckhorst, whose spectacular 35-yard blast into the top corner of Uruguay’s goal could well be voted best goal of the competition.

Van Marwijk needed to replace two starters because of suspension against Uruguay. Demy De Zeeuw took Nigel De Jong’s central midfield spot, and Khalid Boulahrouz took over for Gregory Van der Weil at right back. Neither replacement lasted the match, and despite the Dutch’s impressive run of a half-dozen wins, they haven’t recorded a shutout in the last four games.

By contrast, Spain has rolled into the final on a string of one-goal victories (including three consecutive 1-0 wins) and the scoring of David Villa after Switzerland stung it with a 1-0 defeat to open the competition. Villa scored both goals in a 2-0 defeat of Honduras that restored Spain’s confidence, and he netted again along with Andres Iniesta to down Chile, 2-1, and take top spot in Group H.

Villa scored in the 63rd minute to beat a Portuguese team that seldom mounted a threat, and in their quarterfinal the Spaniards had to endure a wild, back-to-back swap of missed penalty kicks to subdue Paraguay with a Villa goal just seven minutes before the end of regulation. Paraguay’s pressure in the first half jarred Spain out its rhthym and nearly stole the match.

Coach Vicente del Bosque has not juggled his personnel much, except to drop sputtering forwardFernando Torres for the semifinal defeat of Germany. For that match he added Pedro, who distracted and confused the Germans with slick touches in every nook and cranny of the attacking third while playing as a winger/second forward. Otherwise the midfield has remained intact, though the alignment and patterns of play have varied. And somehow, Spain has gone through six World Cup games without a suspension.

The cohesion and continuity of Iniesta, Xavi, Xabi Alonso and Sergio Basquets has highlighted with each game, and for long intervals the outflanked Germans chased shadows fruitlessly in pursuit of the ball. Some fine goalkeeping by Manuel Neuer kept Spain at bay until defender Carles Puyolcrashed home a dramatic header from Xavi’s corner kick.

Spain rode out the remaining minutes to win a knockout semifinal for the first time. It stands ready to eradicate decades of disappointment against a foe bearing its own stigma of failure at the final hurdle.

Paths to the final

DURBAN, South Africa (AP) — Spain outplayed Germany yet again.

And now the Spanish have the biggest prize of all within their sights.

Spain will play for the World Cup title for the very first time thanks to Carles Puyol’s goal on a powerful header in the second half Wednesday night. The 1-0 victory was the exact same score as the European Championship final two years ago, which Spain won to end a 44-year major title drought.

But while the European title is nice, nothing compares to being the world champ.

Spain will play the Netherlands in Sunday’s final at Soccer City in Johannesburg, ensuring a first-time champion. The Dutch, who beat Uruguay on Tuesday night, have lost in their only two trips to the final.

When the final whistle sounded, the Spanish players on the field thrust their arms in the air while the substitutes raced onto the field. Their smiles were so bright they could be seen all the way to the top of the stadium in Durban, their roars of elation almost loud enough to drown out the blare of those vuvuzelas.

For Germany, it’s yet another disappointment. The three-time champs were making their third straight trip to the World Cup semifinals. Yet just like in 2006, they are headed for the third-place game.

The Germans retooled their team after the Euros loss in Vienna, bringing in youngsters such as Mesut Oezil, Sami Khedira and goal-scoring machine Thomas Mueller, who was suspended after picking up a second yellow card in the quarters. But the Germans looked as if they were back in Vienna for much of the night, allowing big, bad Spain to dominate again.

Chelsea are rumoured to be lining up a record breaking £65m bid for Liverpool striker Fernando Torres. Carlo Ancelotti has been given the full backing of Stamford Bridge chairman Roman Abramovich to spend big to bring in the best talent around to help cement the west London club’s position as the Premier League champions. Roy Hodgson’s arrival at the club has been greeted with a muted response from the Anfield playing squad and the Blues may feel that now is the time to attempt to snare the Spaniard.

Whilst its true that El Nino has not had the greatest of World Cup’s thus far he is undeniably one of the best strikers in Europe and with Chelsea’s current strike pairing of Didier Drogba and Nicolas Anelka both being the wrong side of 30 it is imperative that they plan for the future and have therefore targeted the 26 year old as a potential big name addition.

The Anfield outfit are heavily in debt but the club’s under fire American owners would indeed have to think twice about accepting any such offer given that doing so would simply make Messrs Hicks and Gillett even more disliked.

The player himself has stated his desire to stay at the club so any move for the former Atletico Madrid man may well fall on deaf ears.

Previous Chelsea interest in Torres – Chelsea Ready To Open Their Cheque Book With Sensational £100 Million Swoop For Kaka And Fernando Torres (The People)

CAPE TOWN, South Africa(AP) — Spain spent most of the night trying to break through Portugal’s defense. David Villa finally did it.

Villa scored off his own rebound in the 63rd minute, giving the European champs a 1-0 victory Tuesday that put them into the World Cup quarterfinals.

In a game where Spain dominated possesion and outshot the Portuguese, Villa took Xavi Hernandez’ heel pass in the 63rd minute. But his left-footed shot was saved by Portuguese goalkeeper Eduardo.

He then fired the rebound with his right foot off the underside of the crossbar and into the net – his fourth goal of the tournament – sprinted to the near corner and slid on his knees to the flag, letting out a mighty yell.

“It was one of my best goals because it got us through to the next round,” Villa said. “Keep scoring so we can keep going.”

Spain plays Paraguay in the quarterfinals on Saturday.

While Villa is tied for the lead in scoring at the World Cup, it was a disappointing tournament for Cristiano Ronaldo, the world’s most expensive player. His only goal came late in Portugal’s 7-0 rout of North Korea in group play, and he had a quiet night against Spain.

The game came two years to the day that Spain ended 44 years of international futility by winning the European title. The last defending European champ to also capture the World Cup was West Germany in 1974.

Spain was about teamwork, and it showed from the start. Fernando Torres and Villa immediately moved down the left, looking to exploit Portugal’s defensive weakness at right back, where Ricardo Costa struggled. Within the first seven minutes, Eduardo had to make three quality saves to keep Portugal in the game on angled shots from Spain’s two strikers.

Yet Spain moved on to an intricate passing game through the center of the field. Once Portugal’s defense settled in it frustrated the Spanish, reducing them to long-range attempts by Gerard Pique.

Still, Villa knew a goal was coming.

“We never lost our confidence,” Villa said. “We know the potential we have and what we can give.”

This was 33rd time the Iberian neighbors have met in soccer, but the first time in the World Cup. Spain has won 16 of the matches to Portugal’s five.

Manchester City have agreed a £29million deal with Valencia for Spain international David Silva.

The 24-year-old, who had also been courted by Real Madrid and Chelsea, is now expected to finalise terms on a four year contract worth around £160,000 a week.
City delegates have been in Spain to iron out the deal amid concerns that Chelsea may step in at the eleventh hour but are confident everything is now in place.
They plan to team the silky midfielder with Yaya Toure and James Milner in a revamped side geared not just for Champions League qualification but a title push.
City are still searching for a right-back and will add a striker too before the end of the window but Silva has been a priority, as revealed in Sportsmail last month.
The one-time Mancheser United target had been keen on a move to Chelsea but they were unwilling to match cash-strapped Valencia’s valuation. (Daily Mail)

If indeed this source hasn’t gotten ahead of itself then this is a great deal Roberto Mancini has sealed. The 24 year old Valencia man has been one of the stars of La Liga over the past four seasons and is the type of player that has fans on the edge of their seats.

More importantly than that though is the fact that Manchester City have signed someone capable of providing ample ammunition for their numerous strikers to finish off. It did seem at one point that Chelsea were leading the chase for the pint sized winger and that perhaps the Spanish international would opt to stay in his homeland but it seems that he was impressed by the potential the Eastlands side has in abundance and indeed if Mancini can follow up this capture with the likes of Yaya Toure and James Milner then they will surely be a good bet for a top four challenge next term.